In business, it is commonly said that you should: do things from your head and not your heart – think logically, not emotionally – be reasonable and rational. What if I told you that I do not agree? I began my commercial real estate firm in 2001 out of my passion for making commercial deals and working with others towards a common end goal of optimizing commercial real estate profits for my clients. Through these years I realized that often getting emotional and empathetic actually helps both me and my clients to work together and achieve success.
In seeing that this angle of personal interaction worked for me, I decided to research this further. I found that it is called Emotional Intelligence, and is the ability to interpret and read your client’s emotions, and then use that emotional interaction to adapt within a business situation. I learned that emotional intelligence helps you to adjust your emotional response and build a better rapport with your client, which in turn creates loyalty. Your clients begin to feel more valued and this helps build a stronger working connection.
In my research, I discovered that there are many ways to build emotional intelligence. Demonstrating empathy gives me the ability to step into my client’s shoes and understand where they are in their emotional and professional space. From here I can better help my client’s to get what they need. Knowing my client’s personalities greatly helps me move deals forward. In knowing their personalities, I then am also aware of their triggers and can avoid frustration on their behalf. Another key thing that I believe is helpful is making sure that expectations are in line – on both my end and theirs. When there is transparency deals always go much more smoothly. I naturally am not the type to hide my thoughts or information and have always found that this helps my clients to find me as a trustworthy partner. On the same token, this also sets a mutual respect for each other. A last example of how I use emotional intelligence is by learning not to take things personally, yet take responsibility when need be. The commercial real estate industry, especially here on Long Island, can be tough – and usually is. Knowing this helps me to not take things personally and helps me to take the responsibility from my clients and put it on myself in order to get through stressful times or daunting tasks. I would rather that I feel the weight of a deal on my shoulders than to let it affect my client.
I have found that this emotional intelligence is indeed a muscle that constantly needs to be worked, and at the same time, it also needs to flex. Each and every client of mine has a different situation and therefore, the emotional intelligence tools that will be needed are going to be different as well. I always keep in mind that every deal is different, and in every deal that is done something new will be discovered. I go into these deals knowing that sales sometimes result from divorces, deaths, and other highly emotional circumstances. For example, knowing that an Estate Sale will likely be a highly emotional period for a seller, I’ll go in with the understanding that this is not just simply a retail strip and a medical building, this is much more to my client – showing that I understand that and I am empathetic to my client’s emotions help to set a connection between me and my clients and establishes a mutual trust and respect. With each deal, knowing that there will be situations that need to be diffused and fires will need to be put out at a rapid pace helps me understand what lies ahead and lets me separate myself from the stress that may be faced. Understanding my clients and being able to emotionally connect with them helps to make challenges easier to navigate. So, let me say this: don’t just go in with your head, go in with your heart. Make rational decisions but also listen to your intuitions. And don’t ever forget that when your logic and emotions work hand-in-hand great things happen.
